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GIVE MORE,EXPECT LESS.

It could be a relationship we are expecting a lot from. For instance, we fall in love and fall into the world of fantasy and imagine ourselves and our partner doing all sorts of wonderful things as couples. We plan marriage in our head, We imagine the reception at the wedding, We imagine our kids looking like our partner and so on. All these play in our mind, but eventually just as we imagined, it did not play out as we wanted it to in real life. Failure to achieve all we hoped for in real life has led some people to become shadows of themselves. The reason for this is that you become emotionally attached to a person you truly love and care about. It is the human nature to expect a lot from a loved one in terms of commitment, trust, love and what comes with it but when we do not get these in return, we become disappointed, sad and it has led some people to depression and suicide.

I knew a lady who loved her man so much, but I do not know so much about the man though I can say from the way he treats her when I see both of them together shows he loves and respects her. So, I was convinced he loved her.They were so fond of themselves. There was a day the lady came to my mother, she looked sad.Though, I was not so much interested why she came to see my mother because she occasionally comes to chat with my mother. I overheard her conversation when she was telling my mother she caught her husband being intimate with another lady and I could hear the sobs in her voice which means she was still hurting. I could barely hear my mothers voice, but I heard the sound of the pat she was tapping on her shoulders, the lady said it was the least action she expected from her husband. She told my mother her husband had been apologizing, but she could not bear him speaking to her. I felt sad when I heard a little bit of her story, but I did not listen to all of their conversations.

Eventually, she left our house for that day. I saw her again in our house the next three weeks when I returned from school and my mother was spoon – feeding her liquid food. I could not ask my mother why she was doing that the moment I saw her because I was surprised. Besides, she is a grown adult who can feed herself and the last time I saw her, she looked healthy even if she was crying due to the fact she was heart broken. Shortly after, her husband came to pick her up, she did not say a word even when my mother fed her, she looked lost. When she left with her husband, my mother told me her husband brought her to our home because she has not spoken for over eighteen days and since she is close to my mother he felt that could help. I was in shock. This lady changed dramatically to become decreased in vivacity due to the traumatic experience she had. Her outgoing and lively persona was replaced by gloom and seriousness. She could not talk, she became dumb and distant.

Not all expectation turn out bad especially expectation from the right people and the right result.Most times, when we expect we never expect the bad or worst things we assume every expectation comes with a good result and believe it will never go wrong. Expectations are painful when we do not get the desired result. Sometimes, we put all we expect from the other person in our mind and when this is not communicated, the other person is unaware of what you expect.

Expecting too much sets up for disappointment. The best thing we can do for ourselves is not to be expecting and if we eventually do, we should Not blame people for disappointing us.Rather, it is you who expected too much. Give more, expect less. Give out love Give out knowledge or what the other person needs(if you can provide it) because you want to see them happy. I will stop writing and drop these last words from the holy bible, Proverbs chapter eleven verses twenty-five. ‘A generous person will prosper, whoever refreshes others will be refreshed’.

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