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A JOURNEY TO SELF DISCOVERY (1)

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself – Mark Twain.

My father and I arrived in the school premises at precisely 6:38 p.m. I can remember the precise time clearly because at a point in our journey I was tired and I kept looking at my wrist watch and kept asking my father the actual time we were reaching, but he kept telling me ten minutes more and when it had gotten to ten minutes, he tells me ten minutes again. So, I practically glued my eyes to my wrist watch. When we arrived, I looked at my wrist watch and took note of the time. It’s something I can’t forget easily.

My father sighed and said; at last! We have arrived. He opened the entryway in the drivers side and came down to open the entryway for me. I was full of fervor, so I hopped down quickly like a puppy discharged from a cage, He went behind the vehicle to bring down my luggage to where other students were standing. As we continuously walked to the other side where other students stood, my father saw the fervor on my face, and he flashed a grin. He told me he was pondering if I can adapt in a boarding school, but seeing my reaction makes him feel at ease that I’ll be fine and I gestured emphatically, I told him I will be fine. Most plants were green, perhaps not all, but the plants I saw were green; green fields, green blooms, I just like the tranquility. At the distant end of the field, I saw the Nigerian flag (Green and white or Green white Green) and the song green land by Ty Bello (Singer) flashed my mind I begun humming the song…🎵🎶

The land is green – it’s green Ooooh. The Land is green – it’s green Can’t you see?

The Normal protocols were observed and my father wished me well. I followed the other female students to the hostel with my luggage as coordinated by a woman who talked to us and showed us the route we ought to follow to the hostel. Though it was a stone throw from where we were standing, such that, we don’t need to take any means of transportation. Rather we trekked to the hostel. On getting to the hostel premises, I saw a few other young ladies in a group, a kind of casual and not serious group; chatting and chuckling, A few was slouching. The buildings were four structures facing themselves and a huge tag hung underneath the roof. I had a fast look and noticed each tag has the title of distinctive colors composed on it. One tag has Red HOUSE the other has GREEN HOUSE the other BLUE and the final PURPLE HOUSE they were four.

Move over there I heard a voice behind me; I turned quickly and saw a lady pointing one of her fingers above my head I looked at the direction she pointed and also looked at the tag above I saw BLUE HOUSE. I thanked her, but there was no response she walked away. I was putting on a blue check dress I noticed other girls had different colors just like the colors written boldly below the roof of the structures I saw and some girls were putting on casual wears, I entered the room that has the tag BLUE HOUSE I saw some girls stepping out from the hostel. Few grouped themselves in twos as they came out while some came out in threes and others just came out on their own without attaching themselves to groups. I waited till they came out, they gave a brief stare and passed.One of the ladies stopped, You are new right? She said to me. I nodded my head forward and backward and gave out a watery smile (weak smile) She helped me take in my luggage.

Who is that fatty? And after that question there was laughter in the background. The lady who carried my bag gave a mockery smile and walked out leaving my bag beside me while I stood facing some girls. I could not count the number of girls I was facing besides, I was reluctant to know the number of girls I was facing because I was already upset with that name. Yes! I am fat, but ‘fatty’ is not my name.I kept mute and frowned , I also ignored the question. Of course, that question should not be for me, I said to myself.

Though some girls were still laughing, one of them came forward but not close to me, she ordered me to drop my bag and start jogging from the entrance door to the other end of the hostel because fat girls are not allowed. Let her rest! I heard another voice, but the lady who stood insisted I must Jog. I felt embarrassed, I have never felt this way and never been talked to about my body. I dropped my bag pack I was carrying and started jogging while the girls kept laughing. I jogged for about 40 minutes I was exhausted and upset, I had to rest.

(Davfin’s PNG image)

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